talking shit
you know, wishes aren't supposed to come true. especially when they're bad, and when you don't mean them. and, i swear to god, i never wished for something like this to happen. i talk too much shit.....i say things i don't mean most of the time. i'm probably only writing this to make myself feel better and to reassure myself that i had no part in it.....so fucking selfish. life sure is ironic.
well....after all those times...months and months....blog entry after blog entry of talking shit about my supervisor, the lady that runs around everywhere like a chicken with her head cut off, something terrible has befallen her. as i mentioned previously, she has been gone for nearly 3 weeks to get her ovary removed because it may be cancerous. i just received a text message from her, updating me about her condition. we have not spoken since she has gone. although the lady irritates the hell out of me sometime, i am the one that misses her the most. i'm so fucking immature....such a fucking brat. things have been different for me since she's been gone. i thought she was against me, but i may have just lost my biggest supporter at my school.
so, it turns out that she does have cancer and has started chemotherapy. the text message that i received from her was full of hurt and emotion, shit that no one can really repond to except the creator herself. it's funny because you can only write up to 500 characters on a long text message. but, it was enough for such painful questions and statements like, "reika, life is unfair." and "what have i done?" and i have never met anyone who has wanted a child as badly as her. shit is fucked cuz her ability to create life will be stripped from her at the age of 36. how is a person supposed to repond to that? how is anyone supposed to console her? what words can i say to help her make sense of this all? i feel bad...i never wished for this to happen to her. maybe president bush with his penis, but not my supervisor. this just brings me back to 8 years ago when i had to watch my father undergo chemotherapy......cancer is a mother fucking bitch. but, it can be beaten.
with this entry, i want to be positive. i want to send her positive energy and my prayers (uhh...even though i'm agnostic, i consider prayers to be good thoughts) and hope that some of you (yes, all 5 of my readers) send your good thoughts along her way too.
thanks.
well....after all those times...months and months....blog entry after blog entry of talking shit about my supervisor, the lady that runs around everywhere like a chicken with her head cut off, something terrible has befallen her. as i mentioned previously, she has been gone for nearly 3 weeks to get her ovary removed because it may be cancerous. i just received a text message from her, updating me about her condition. we have not spoken since she has gone. although the lady irritates the hell out of me sometime, i am the one that misses her the most. i'm so fucking immature....such a fucking brat. things have been different for me since she's been gone. i thought she was against me, but i may have just lost my biggest supporter at my school.
so, it turns out that she does have cancer and has started chemotherapy. the text message that i received from her was full of hurt and emotion, shit that no one can really repond to except the creator herself. it's funny because you can only write up to 500 characters on a long text message. but, it was enough for such painful questions and statements like, "reika, life is unfair." and "what have i done?" and i have never met anyone who has wanted a child as badly as her. shit is fucked cuz her ability to create life will be stripped from her at the age of 36. how is a person supposed to repond to that? how is anyone supposed to console her? what words can i say to help her make sense of this all? i feel bad...i never wished for this to happen to her. maybe president bush with his penis, but not my supervisor. this just brings me back to 8 years ago when i had to watch my father undergo chemotherapy......cancer is a mother fucking bitch. but, it can be beaten.
with this entry, i want to be positive. i want to send her positive energy and my prayers (uhh...even though i'm agnostic, i consider prayers to be good thoughts) and hope that some of you (yes, all 5 of my readers) send your good thoughts along her way too.
thanks.
posted by shan at 2:38 AM
1 Comments:
Don't beat yourself up over this, Shannon. It's not our fault and what you can do to support her during this time is to be there for her, especially because you've been through it and you know what it's like. Now, if YOU need someone as well, you know where I live and where I blog.
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